The Definition Of A Cougar

I would like to start off by saying hello to my readers at MTV.... who knew?

So, today I would like to tackle an interesting subject to say the least. It really wasn't that long ago, when my friend The Seede, dropped the term "Coug" into a casual conversation on a porch of mine and I had no idea what he was talking about.

Really though, why would I? I pretty much had been in back to back relationships the previous two years; and surrounded by nothing but college girls )and my friends and I going after the college girls) the entire time preceding those failed endeavors, not hanging out in bars that were laden with women over the age of 30... but I digress. What IS a Cougar?

When I asked the people gathered round me that day on my porch, I was answered with a slue of laughter that I can only describe as being matched by the time I asked my friend Seth in 5th grade what "popping her cherry" meant. Color me naive once again. When the laughter died, they described a "Coug" to me as:

(i'll direct quote the best I can from memory)

"You dumb sonofabitch. A COUG is a 30+ year old woman who hasn't been married who is really fuckin hot, who doesn't have children, and who is all about Guys fresh out of college... like us!"

(I'm not 1000% certain, but I am pretty sure this was followed by ridiculous boasts made by all parties on how they were exactly right for potential prey)

Shortly there after, I moved to Austin, and have had the opportunity to work with several women in their 30's and 40's (some of who are ridiculously attractive) who do indeed love to exchange flirty banter with other young men, as well as myself. Some of these women have been married before, most all of them drive nice cars and are financially stable, all have great senses of humor and still party like its their 21st birthday.... hmmmm... we may have found our definition... but, it brings up an interesting question.... WHY?!?!?

These women that I am talking about don't seem to play games, and also do not seem to want a relationship from these guys. They are straight forward pretty much. THEY will buy your drinks, THEY will get you drunk, THEY will take you home and THEY will make all the moves... this sounds awfully familiar...

I have often talked about how relationships affect people in my other forms of bloggish mediums, and how cyclical it all is. There is not a "soul mate" for you per say, but there are people that you click with much better than others. There are also 2 types of relationships when you boil down to it.

A) The one that you are the giver
B) The one that you are the taker

If you were the giver, and it ended leaving you single, you are more than likely still hurt and bitter about it. Its going to cause you to be quite resentful of that person, and project whatever hangups you have about that onto the next one that comes along... hence, YOU become the taker

If you were the taker, then when its over you might be hit with a massive sense of remorse, or MAYBE you just happen into a relationship that you over amplify the new person in to incredible heights (they will never be able to live up to) and hit them with a flood of pinned up emotions and YOU become the giver.

Now, if the person on the other side is on the inverse side of the cycle, its going to work for a while, but ultimately end in disaster and a reversing of the roles again in the future. This perpetual cycle will continue until you finally meet someone riding the same wave as you...

Its bullshit, when someone tells you that you can't change someone, because you can.. you just have to remember, "A watched pot never boils"

So lets tie this into our inquisition... A "Cougar" may really be someone who has been burned by men so many times, it has caused her to develop an unhealthy obsessive fixation on them, and in the process has adopted the characteristics and qualities of the people that set her heart to blaze. Young men are easy prey, because they generally are easily seduced by snatch an hooch and after the "Cougar" has devoured their target sexually to her liking, she moves on... and if he calls and wants more and she turns him down, its like a little moral victory for her.

Basically, she gets to play Miss Havisham and Estella all at the same time.