Wooin back the Ex

I don't know why i haven't thought of this before... but, I have really figured out what will re-attract a girl to me.

I was at this wedding this past Saturday, two old friends of mine tying knots and all, and my ex girlfriend was in the wedding party.

God......she looked UNREAL hot.

Its not like I haven't missed her for a long time either, and like I haven't seen her in forever, and I was nervous but knew I had to tell her some things. And I knew that I had to be sober to do it.

Post wedding- I arrived at the reception stag, and started chit chattin with some old friends, having a pretty good time. I kept on seeing her out of the corner of my eye... I was overcome with emotions... knew exactly what I had to do... tell her what was really on my mind.

I caught her outside for a smoke and let the rain pour. I was real and honest, completely sober- and it came out exactly as I meant it to. Even if it wasn't going to work, I still said it and felt great about it.

So, with confession out of the way, I figured it was time to start tippin cups with the best of them. Slamming beers with guys i haven't seen in a while, drinkin some strong straight doubles with my ol' twin... yeah, shit was flowin hot.

Dancing came about, everything was going great... but then it happened....

Your boi slid past tipsy into wasted.

Now, the thing about me is, when I am drunk- I get supreme tunnel vision and lose all ability to rationalize... this combined with the fact that I can still talk, stand, and even pull off at times like I am sober is a terrible combination. While most people would have thrown up in the toilet and passed out in a rose bush- I keep drinking, and getting less cool, more impatient and flat out ridiculous.

So, what better way to woo back the love of my life, the one that got away, this girl I have missed for a straight 13 months, than to talk trash to the guy thats hitting on her. Yeah, nothing is as hot as jealousy. NOTHING IN THE WORLD says "I have grown up a lot" like someone trying to show their alpha male side either.

Color. Me. A. Fool.

It wasnt until like me calling her for the second time that night after the bar (oh, and dont worry, I discovered the next day that I had accompanied them with texts) that a moment of clarity came to me and I realized how foolish I was being.

I tried to text her the next day, but response was to be found like a positive(honest) review of the new Indiana Jones movie.

So, was it fate I fucked that up, or just me being a complete idiot once again? I am not 100% sure of the answer to that, but I can tell you that for your boi here-- alcohol and exes are oil and water.