An Idea For Our Dying Economy

So, it seems our economy is in need of a boost.

I have long been told the more money people are spending, the more money people are making. Money changing hands is better for our country than it just sitting in a bank somewhere... or at least thats what a $$$1900 class told me (i wonder if that was a good economical move)

So anyway, I woke up the other morning, extremely hungover on my couch, and directly in front of me was the drum set for the video game rock band.

I looked around the rest of the room and saw the guitar, the mic, and a whole lot of cardboard that had "ROCK BAND" plastered all over it.

"DAMNIT!!!! I GOT DRUNK AND WENT TO WAL MART AGAIN!"

Well, it got me to thinking about all of the superfluous purchases I have made when intoxicated. Its like money means nothing. 'Hey you, person I have never met- let me buy you a drink' 'Hey Mr. Street Vendor selling heart attacks on a stick, I'll take two', 'Hey bartendress that just gave me one drink, let me tip you 100%' --------- you get the point.

ANYWAY, so if it is this way for me- I figure it has to be this way for a lot of people. So, I say listen up Greenspan---here is the greatest idea ever....

Let's give all of America BOOZE and leave more stores open past 2. I mean, I don't want to encourage drunk driving- but drunk SHOPPING is a completely different thing. I mean, how many video games do you think are actually bought between the hours of 1am-4am sober anyway? Those folks are either tossed to the side or shit-ass-high. I would actually wager to guess that 1/3rd of my DVD's were purchased under the influence.

So there it is... still give the tickets for DWI's, but when you catch someone SWI- hand them another mind eraser and mention how fuckin cool that plasma would look hanging on their wall. Get some whiskey bitches, its time to shop!